So many times during the planning process the question arises "What about the Kids?" I have several thoughts about kids at weddings and receptions. My first thought is "PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE make sure you are using children who are old enough to walk down the aisle, follow instructions and stand still as your ring bearer and flower girls. Yes, I understand that you might have a cute two year old in your life. Unless that two year old is you or your fiance's personal child please do not put them in the bridal party; all they are going to do is cause distractions that will take away from the ceremony.
(Children came to this ceremony and several children were a part of the bridal party. Once parents arrived at the reception, they took their children to a separate room for a children's reception where they ate, and participated in structured activities the rest of the night. The children had so much fun that they did not want to go home at the end of the night).
Some brides do not want children in their bridal party and as a matter of fact do not want children to come to the wedding/reception. First, I want to say to you if you are one of those brides that is absolutely ok. You are probably going to get some negative feedback from family and friends who have children but stand your ground and don't feel bad.
Personally, I feel that if the reception is going to start late at night or if there will be a lot of alcohol and dancing the children might have a better time somewhere else. After all, children tend to get tired and bored after an hour or two and then they will cut into the good time their parents and everyone else could have had. I do recommend that you have something separate set up for the children so that all involved can have an enjoyable evening. Here are my suggestions:
(Above) - Children came to the wedding ceremony (Below) and went to a separate room at the venue for their own reception. The children ate and participated in structure activities in their room, however, some of the children came back into the main reception for some of the dancing, we also arranged for the horse drawn carriage that the couple would be leaving in to come early and take the children for carriage rides during the reception).
1. Perhaps allow children to come to the ceremony. Some churches have a separate room for mothers who are nursing or for them to take babies when they are crying that still allows them to see and hear what is going on. Check with the church you are using. You might also want to check and see if the church will allow you to use their nursery during the ceremony.
2. If you absolutely do not want children at the ceremony make sure child care is provided an hour before ceremony time through the end of the reception. My suggestion would be to utilize the hotel where your guests are staying, that way parents can drop children off and pick them up at the hotel when reception is over.
(The children at this reception had special tables set up for them inside of the reception for their dinner, they were then taken to a special area where they had structured activities and a place they could go to sleep until their parents arrived).
3. If children will attend the ceremony and not reception, have childcare set up perhaps in another room at the reception venue or at an off site location where parents can drop off children on their way to the reception.
(Above) Children were invited to the ceremony as a matter of fact they helped pass out lemonade as the guest exited. (Below) The reception was adult only so children were dropped off at the hotel as their parents were on their way to the reception).
4. Some brides decide to have a designated area inside of the reception such as a children's table or children's area where the children are entertained/supervised and the adults can enjoy themselves with their children nearby. Be sure to talk with your caterer about a separate (less expensive) menu for the children.
(This reception had a separate area for the children in the prefunction space outside of the ballroom. We also had a Children's table set up inside the reception room for the older children to come in and eat and dance a little while with an adult supervising the children while parents enjoyed the reception).
5. Whatever you decide to do, make sure the children are supervised by Certified child care workers. Make sure that your plan for the children is well thought out so that children and their parents can enjoy themselves. Wherever the children are, make sure they get some of the wedding cake as you know that is one of their favorite parts of the reception. If the children are at the same venue you might want to allow them to participate in a dance or two before leaving the room. Lastly, make sure there are lots of activities to keep the children occupied and satisfied.
(Children were invited to this ceremony and reception. The children had a great time dancing with the DJ who danced with them and taught them some new dance steps).
Happy wedding planning,
Calandra Terry
Huntsville Alabama wedding planner
For some reason I think its common knowledge… I mean haven’t we all heard from someone, stories at some point of things that didn’t go right at a wedding. They happen at every single wedding no matter who is in charge. I know brides are working with a budget- especially these days but everyone seems to think they can save on costs by “doing it themselves”. I have an idea… Lets invest in a great photographer to capture the moments and the details, lets hire a floral designer to make everything look pretty, lets spend money on linens, favors, and a dessert bar but when it comes to getting a professional wedding coordinator to pull together all the details I just mentioned so all of them work in harmony.. lets skimp on that? Lets invest all of that but then on the wedding day as a bride you can worry or pawn it off on an aunt, mom, or wedding party member (which lets be quite frank-they will be way more frazzled than you). Just to be clear.. I am not saying I am against DIY. I’m not! I like that style BUT I am a huge advocate of bringing someone on board who knows what they are doing to put things at ease no matter the scale of the wedding.
